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Insecurities are like a bottomless pit

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Insecurities are like a bottomless pit

  • Sebastien Grynko
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Insecurities are like a bottomless pit

 

Insecurities are like a bottomless pit. 

You’ll NEVER be perfect.
One can have a lot of insecurities but in this post I will focus mainly on physical insecurities.  I will talk about other insecurities another time.

We all have something or many things we would like to change or would like to be different in the way we look. Some can easily be changed, altered, modified... others might cost money, need time and patience to transform.

Getting a haircut is easy but getting a nose job is another thing.

We all have physical insecurities including those who are good looking!  Then, why are we so unsatisfied with the way we look?

In fact, the more good looking you are seen to be, the more insecure you actually tend to be.  Why? Well, now you have the pressure to fit a certain mold.

Furthermore, if you value and hold this identity dearly, it is something you don’t want to lose. Unfortunately nothing last and aging is a great equalizer.


Why do we feel so shitty about ourselves ?  Why is it never enough ?

In a world where appearance and action have more value. The material and the tangible have completely knocked out the immaterial and the intangible.

This give rise to a society where image Is seemingly given more value than it actually has.  We are just tenants of our decaying bodies.

Value has been given to our fragile asset which is depreciating each day.  This cause a lot of insecurities and also a lot of profit for clinics which strive to keep you as youthful as possible, sometimes too much to an extreme.

Advertising is one of the vehicle of this modern ideology of physical materialism. Those in charge of what is supposedly a physical ideal will mold our fragile brains to believe that such and such is the way men and women should look.

Modified videos and airbrushed pictures of models and actors will have brainwashed into believing you need to fit this mold in order to feel good about yourself.

Here is a disclaimer they should broadcast. These people don’t look as good as they do on screen and/or on the page.

Lighting, softwares, makeup, right angles and extraordinary photographers can make visual miracles happen.  Don’t get me wrong, these models are better looking than most people in general.

That is why they are held to the pinnacle of media advertising.  These beautiful people are also subject to aging, to disease, to getting fat, to getting old and a lot of them are surely more insecure than others.

Social media is the poor man’s version of the corporate advertising media. The advent of filters, smart phone and apps such as Instagram are causing more turmoil in the already superficial world we are living in.

The same thing applies for those Amateur IG models. Steroids, filters, lighting, enhancing apps serve to make them seem “perfect” and make you feel like shit.

Consequences of all this .....

When a society placed too much importance and emphasis on attaining unrealistic standards of beauty, it creates some angst.  This is especially true for our youth who have a smartphone in their hand and got wifi access before they got their first sip of their Mom’s breast.

It does create problems when underage teenagers are obsessed with looking in a certain way.

Boys start taking steroids. Girls starve themselves and/or get a boob/nose/lips job... I know some of you can relate to these.

When you are out in the city and your eyes stumble upon a girl who barely seems human.  She looks young but you can’t really give her an age.  She looks like a woman but you’re not 100% sure she is one.  She looks kind of beautiful and kind of ugly as well. And this look is kind of familiar too.

You know why?  Because most surgically enhanced and modified people tend to look alike.

The worst part about this is that some of these boys and girls did not look bad to begin with.  They ruined their physical appearances by wasting money on unnecessary surgeries and injections of unsavory substances.

One of the diseases of the mind that has been “manufactured” by our modern society is body dysmorphia.  Body dysmorphia is a condition in which one falsely believe that there is something seriously wrong with their appearance.

This can lead to a lot of troubles and unnecessary waste of limited energy and happiness you have in your life.

What can we do about this ?

Well first for all, I want to tell you guys that I am not exempt from this kind of behaviour.  “Au contraire”,  I had periods of my life when I suffered from being skinny, acne and braces.

Teenage years are a real bitch. I would not go back to those years if given a chance!  Till today, the trauma and the mocking of my peers of these years have made me feel insecure at times.  It is something to be aware of in order to “reverse” it.

What you can do about it is simple and straightforward. You need to realize a few things for starters.

The first one is you will never be perfect. You’ll never reach a level of complete satisfaction with yourself.  Even if you think you do, someone will be pointing out or might not like something about you.

We are all different and people have different taste when it comes to what they like and what they don’t like.  Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder. 

If you are insecure, you will always find something to be unhappy about. Something you would want to change.  You don’t want to go down this rabbit hole. It ain’t a good trip.

Truth be told. Nobody gives a fuck about you anyway.  Most people are too busy being worried about their own insecurities to have time to point out your “flaws”.

Once you realize those two things and hopefully have relieved yourself of some stress. You could also realize that appearance does matter to a certain extent.

Of course it does!  I would be lying if I say that it does not but it’s not the be all and end all. You should not just focus on it.   Your appearance is only one part of who you are.  Better yourself and your physique to the best of your abilities and to your own satisfaction.

If you look fit, healthy and clean with a nice style.  It’s more than good enough. You don’t need six packs of striations, no fake boobs, none of these things.

There are exceptions obviously.  If you are a woman whose ass and tits are flatter than a flat tv screen, then yes, do some squats and if it will make you feel better, get your breasts enhanced.  But you don’t need to go from nothing to Pamela Anderson. 
Guys, if you’re losing some hair and you want to get a transplant. By all means get one. Why not take advantage of the technology available?

What I am trying to say is you need to feel good about yourself regardless of the way you look.  People don’t pay much attention to you anyway.  If someone rejects you for the way you look then fuck them!  You don’t want them in your life. Good riddance!  
Accept yourself the way you are. Change what you can change.   If you can’t fix it, embrace it and be confident about it.

Cheers
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About the Author

Sebastien Grynko

As a meditation teacher, a fitness & and muay thai fanatic/enthusiast with a taste for entrepreneurship. He decided to create a business which can combine all his passions and inspire people all over the world by helping people physically, mentally and spiritually to find their purpose, well-being and health to thrive and contribute to this world.

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