Why men cheat ?
Why men cheat ?
- Sebastien Grynko
It is a fact that men cheat more than women. No surprises there. It is a problem for most women, even though some seem to be ok with it. When I say ok. It is more like what I do not see, I do not have to know..
Everybody is different and so is every relationship, therefore I won’t make any judgment. I am not here to condone nor to condemn. I would like to give women some deeper understanding in the workings of a man's mind and body.
I also hope that through this newfound knowledge, we can find ways to prevent suffering and transcend those unnecessary situations. Let’s start by naming some of the reasons why men cheat.
The first reason that comes to mind is that men are more sexualised than women. That’s why prostitution is a profession almost exclusively practised by women. Of course, there are some women who have very high libido but they are the exceptions to the rule.
Men are conquerors by nature of their masculine energy and the yearn for sex is a byproduct of that essence. Women will never be able to grasp this drive for sex and nothing I am saying here is an excuse for cheating. It is more an issue for men to keep it in their pants especially when it is readily available.
The second reason that comes to mind is that men are more visual. I know most women don’t like to hear this because they believe their men to be more attracted to their individuality, instead of their form.
This could be the case after some time but the first thing that a man will be attracted to is the shape, the form, the curves and the face. If he is not attracted to what he sees, he will not consider you as a potential mate to commit to.
He might want to have sex with you but that’s as far as it goes. Most men have very open standards when it comes to just having sex. And the hornier they are, the lower their standards will be. Add alcohol to the mix and they are open to anything with a couple of chromosomes X.
Another reason for men to cheat is that you’re letting yourself go. By that, I mean if you used to look like a Victoria’s Secret angel and now you look like Gwyneth Paltrow in Shallow Hal. Your man is likely to check other pastures and find that the grass is greener.
He may not stop loving you but his desire for you has waned. He’s still going to want sex so he’s more likely to cheat with better looking women. A subsequent reason is if you are denying him sex, withholding it, not giving him enough or being passive and waiting for it to end.
If sex is used as a bargaining chip, a transaction or as a reward for good domestic behaviour, you are going to have trouble. One of the main reasons for men to be in a committed relationship is the convenient access to readily available sex. There is no two ways about it. Don’t be fooled.
Some men also cheat because it is in their nature as I said earlier. Some of them are weak or find themselves in situations that are just too hard to resist.
Most of them can stay away from trouble and not cheat if not given the opportunity. However, these same men will easily succumbed if sex is presented on a silver platter. It’s just too tempting to refuse.
Other men are just egomaniacs. In a modern society where strength, virility and masculinity are constantly undermined. The only way for some men to feel worthy in the hierarchy of men is to cheat and get as many sexual conquests as they possibly can. This is ridiculous but it is true for some men nevertheless.
At this point, many of you women must be feeling pretty despondent or even disgusted. I want to put things into perspective. This article is about cheating so it will raise some eyebrows and make a few of you angry.
However I did not say that all men are cheaters. I did say that men are much, much more likely to cheat than women but ultimately nobody is coercing them to indulge in those types of behaviour.
That being said, in most cases cheating is not always the fault of the person who committed the “treacherous” acts. I have listed above several reasons why men are more likely to cheat and a lot of what I wrote can be prevented by putting in some effort.
First, women need to understand and accept the nature of men. I did not say accept their shortcomings. What I am saying is to understand what drives a man and what keeps a man.
A lot of men won’t even think about cheating if their female counterpart (you!) was putting in more efforts to be their sole object of their desire. It hurts to read. Right ? It is what it is. Women are a lot of things and being an object of a man’s sexual fantasy is one of them.
I would also recommend to find a man who does not have a reputation of going behind a woman’s back. Find a man who has values and who is loyal. They do exist. Men who transcended their mammal instincts for better purposes while remaining loyal to one partner at a time.
Women can also transcend this by first accepting and understanding that the nature of things is not to be judged but taken in consideration for better decision making and therefore better outcomes.
By understanding, you know what to do. What to look for and not settle for something that is beneath you. So accept, understand and then transcend.
- Sebastien Grynko